WHAT MY SUMMER ABROAD TAUGHT ME ABOUT CULTURAL DIFFRENCES

During the summer of 2006 i went to England to stay with my aunt. Before going there i had little knowledge of British people other than what i seen on television. i envisioned a place just like what i have seen on TV but to my surprise i learned many things that contradicted my previous knowledge. My first lesson in cultural differences was when i visited my Caucasians aunt’s grandmother’s house. I was taken to the Attic to play with my little cousins when i stumbled upon these black figuring everywhere, there was lunch boxes with black faces, and shirts. i was confused, my cousins called this image Golliwog but i still didn't understand so when i was alone with my aunt i asked her if her grandmother was racist. She quickly explained to me that in Belgium the image is known as Black Peter. She also stated that there have been much talk about whether or not it's racially induced image. She told me black peter has a complicated history but has she understood it he was Santa's helper who got black through delivering presents through the chimney. Many people especially African Americans assume that is a racially based image and they could be right but i feel the most important part of this issue is teaching cultural empathy. i learned quite a lot about race during my stay, in England it seemed that Race and racism plays out differently than in North America. North America has more successful blacks film stars, which i noticed watching many of their TV programs. It seemed pretty apparent that race is closely linked to class, and there is a lot more mixing e.g. inter-racial marriage. There is a lot of things we don't know about other cultures and we can’t base the knowledge we do have on external sources like i have with television. Other than black peter i learned not all English people have bad teeth, tell terrible jokes, not all English people live in London or live thatched cottages like in lord of the rings. 

LOST IN TRANSLATION

Is humor cross-cultural?

We all know laughter is a cross cultural but is humor. Different jokes illicit different responses and apply differently to different people. The same jokes that are funny in North America may not be funny in other parts of the word. This is due to the only factor that I feel applies and that is cultural conditions. Humor preferences depend on the cultural background of the individual. Even with the smile that seems so universal to us, we cannot assume that the meaning is the same all over the world.  Understanding humor requires an in-depth understanding of culture and these cultural conditions that create a persons or a groups identity, the image above illustrates this point well. Humor is a very easy way to break the ice but we must be aware what each culture finds funny in order to not insult or degrade them. One of my Chinese friend at the school shared that she had difficulty comprehending American humor, this was due to many factors one being cultural conditions i.e. language. But because she brought it up, I was able to explain some aspects of it but I’m pretty sure I didn't do a god job of it. I let her watch some clips of Russell peters, which was a bad idea because he makes insensitive racial jokes which I though was run until that moment. Further research needs to be done in order to fully understand the conditions that leads to failure to recognize humor cross culturally.

CULTURE OF OBEDIENCE

Obedience is a form of social influence in which person acts in response to a direct order. The person usually giving the order is usually an authority figure. As i discussed in my previous blog, my mother practice authoritative parenting and an important aspect to that style of parenting is control. Control comes in various form but in this case the form of control my mother instilled was to be obedient or face the consequences otherwise. I choose to focus on obedience due to the cultural implications it presents. A study done by Blake et al 2015 provided statistical evidence that obedience is culturally distinctive to an extent. The study basically found that parents in the United States taught their kids to be more independent than that of the Indian children thus the Indian children were more obedient to their mothers.  Cultural differences are a factor and transferable to many cultures including my Nigerian one. Growing up my mother was very strict, even up until my late teen years i couldn't be out late. My mother based her parenting on how obedient we were, if she told us to do something it had to be done right away. i modeled majority of my behaviors in retrospect to my mother, she taught all my morals and how to live by them, she taught be respect and many more. I am about to generalize here so please excuse me but within African American families there is an extremely high value is placed on respecting, obeying, and learning from elders or authority figures. Don't get me wrong many other ethnicities hold the same values highly but i based my statement on the people i was raised around and the obvious differences in the parenting styles which do have implication on the child's development.

EARLY LIFE EXPERIENCE

The effect of parenting on my psychological development

For many parents around the world, their main role is to care for and prepare there children with the ability to survive. Children are born primarily culture-less and through time they acquire culture through socialization. How children are socialized depends on several factors, one important factor relates to parenting. We all have differences in terms of our confidence, optimism and self-esteem which are greatly influenced by the parents who raised us and how they raised us.

Has a children of a immigrant mother growing up was very different in terms of how north american culture. I remember has a child my mother carrying my baby sister in a back wrapped in a traditional blanket. Of, course i thought nothing of it has a child but i can vividly remember the stares my mother got, regardless my mother maintained her cultural norms. My little sister developed fast in terms of her motor skills, she was crawling and walking earlier than other children her age and that was due to my mother always putting my sister on the floor, she would even massage her legs, even when my mother would hold my sister she always made sure she was sitting up right. According to Steven J. Heine in his cultural psychology textbook evidence supports that these cultural techniques shape the child's development by aiding in motor functions.

Parenting styles differ cross culturally, the way that we were treated and raised has a child has a lot to do with how my parents were brought up. For example my parents growing up had authoritative parents who were very authoritarian and would beat them if they misbehaved. My mother practiced this style of authoritarian parenting. i remember my mother often saying that shes raising us the way her parents raised her. she felt this method pf parenting was the most effective. I personally think the authoritative parenting approach the best. In this approach parents try to understand there children feelings while helping them control and regulate there emotions. this approach allows and encourages there child to be independent while still maintaining control of the child's in terms behavior and limitations. Growing up i never really had a personal relationship with my parents and to this day this personal close relationship many have with there parents is absent. Many African cultures practice this style of authoritative parenting so i'm not alone many of my friends of African or decent don't have this close interpersonal relationship with there parents. It amazes me sometimes in terms of the cultural differences in parenting. my girl friend who is Caucasian grew up with permissive parents, this is evident when i hear her speak to her parents, she even calls her parents by there first name. if i ever called my mom by her first name instead of calling her mom i would be digging my own grave.